1) Logic is a systematic method of coming to the wrong conclusion with confidence.
2) Whenever a system becomes completely defined, some damn fool discovers something which either abolishes the system or expands it beyond recognition.
3) Technology is dominated by those who manage what they do not understand.
4) If builders built buildings the way programmers wrote programs, then the first woodpecker that came along would destroy civilization.
5) The attention span of a computer is only as long as it electrical cord.
6) An expert is one who knows more and more about less and less until he knows absolutely everything about nothing.
7) Nothing ever gets built on schedule or within budget.
8) A failure will not appear till a unit has passed final inspection.
9) New systems generate new problems.
10) To err is human, but to really foul things up requires a computer.
11) Any given program, when running, is obsolete.
12) Any sufficiently advanced technology is indistinguishable from magic.
13) A computer makes as many mistakes in two seconds as 20 men working 20 years make.
14) The faster a computer is, the faster it will reach a crashed state.
15) The primary function of the design engineer is to make things difficult for the fabricator and impossible for the serviceman.
16) To spot the expert, pick the one who predicts the job will take the longest and cost the most.
17) Any circuit design must contain at least one part which is obsolete, two parts which are unobtainable and three parts which are still under development.
18) A complex system that works is invariably found to have evolved from a simple system that works.
19) Computers are unreliable, but humans are even more unreliable. Any system which depends on human reliability is unreliable.
20) If it’s not in the computer, it doesn’t exist.
21) When all else fails, read the instructions.
22) If there is a possibility of several things going wrong the one that will cause the most damage will be the one to go wrong.
23) Build a system that even a fool can use and only a fool will want to use it.
24) Any attempt to print Murphy’s laws will jam the printer.